Been undergoing a process to join a fraternity. It’s personally one of the most difficult experiences that I have gone through. This fraternity is a co-ed fraternity.
When it was rush week, you get to socialize with the members at special events, there were people who you knew you could get along with. People who seemed to be super chill.
I went to a week long of events trying to show how dedicated I could be in showing up. The first event I went to was an informational. I had my questions I wanted to ask and I made sure I asked them all. Although the responses were somewhat vague, the people in the fraternity answered them. I got to meet with a gentleman from that fraternity and he seemed like a really chill guy. He wanted to know about me. And I wanted to know about his experience being in the fraternity.
The next day I went to a Pizza Party social event at a Pizza Parlor. It was great. I got to meet more people from the fraternity, including the niece of one of the founders. My immediate reaction when she bluntly stated that her Greek letters are earned not given and that this was not something you just get to put into your resume made me believe that this was a prestigious fraternity. Of course nothing in life is just handed to you if you want to put value into to, I thought, but the form in which she was so passionate and aggressive with her speech turned me off. I thought to myself, “I want to join your fraternity. I don’t want to be discouraged to do so.”
The following day there was a separates day. The brothers of the fraternity hung out with the brothers and the sisters with the sisters. I got a taste of what it was to be in a fraternity by the brothers. We ended up playing beer pong. The vibe was super chill and relaxed. I got to meet several individuals who spoke great things about being in a fraternity. It was encouraging. My thoughts were that I could personally use some brother motivation. After all, I grew up with sisters and I tend to have an easier time to get a long with girls more than I do with guys. That night I realized I could get used to hanging out with the bros. Even if it was not in my comfort zone since I recently started to let go of my desired sexual orientation, being straight. That’s a whole different topic though.
The last of their rush events was a beach bonfire. This was a moment where I got to meet people. I wanted to be helpful and asked if a girl needed help roasting her marshmellow and she abruptly denied my request. It was okay, not a big deal, but geeze having to be a bitch about it. Come on.
The following week I interviewed for the fraternity. I figured I might as well give it a go and link myself to some sort of organization. I could REALLY use it on my resume. So I went in this set up interview where I had 8 people asking me questions. This was somewhat intimidating because I mean it’s eight people and they’re all staring at you and wondering if you have the traits that they are looking for their fraternity. I’d like to think that this is the moment where they judge you based on how you look, what you say, and how you say it. I wouldn’t say I was a fan of everyone in the fraternity.
I get a call two days later stating that they would love for me to continue with the process and I was invited to what was called a preferential dinner. This dinner you would get to meet the people who are in the fraternity. The people who are “family”. We have dinner and they members get to ask questions we have a formal set of asking the questions.
Here’s where the excitement to wanting to join the fraternity took a turn. We were asked to go into a different room while the members set up the room where we had dinner. They practically turned off the lights, asked us if were were okay with being blindfolded, did not give us instructions about what was about to happen. We were blindfolded and were directed into going into this dark room where we couldn’t laugh, say anything or judge what was going on. Although in my head I realized that this was the moment that the “initiation” took place.
The people who seemed to be the nicest people automatically became the biggest assholes within seconds. It’s like they had a switch to do so. I psychologically could not comprehend what the hell was going on.
When we took off the blindfolds there are lit candles that display our class “Alpha Omega” and four colored candles which I assumed represent their pillars. The president of the organization read off lines that we were to swear by raising our right hand. At this time I really wanted to cross my fingers since I found whatever we were doing to be silly. But I went a long with it.
That was the moment that we realized things were going to change. We were introduced to our “Pledge committee” these were the individuals who are to guide us through the process of becoming an official member. They bombarded us with a series of instructions. One was that we were to address every single member as a mam and a sir. Already I rolled my eyes at this term. We were told to leave the location, after being taught how to do the secret handshake